Nowadays you have to read between the lines, between the time you get the texts, combine the signals you get from the texts and when you meet up in the flesh, read their body language, and whatever it takes really, just to have a glimpse on how they’re feeling about you. Sometimes one waits for a text, other times the other, and then suddenly both are waiting for each other, and then you blink, and then it just gets super complicated. Next thing you know, you’re asking a search engine about a very human (though not so predictable) behavior. I know, it’s difficult, but we’re doing a pretty good job if you ask me – We’re not entirely desperate in this aspect (the romantic aspect) of life. Men are usually straightforward, and when interested they[men] text every day, as a form of the need to communicate with you, to be in touch with you, and to pursue you. They also know how to stop for a bit, let’s say after a fight, and wait for you to text and bring joy to their day. Alright, jokes aside. Here’s what you’ll understand from this article: “So, is he waiting for me to text him?” He might just be waiting for your texts if he: Why those 9 signs can be taken as signs he’s waiting for you to text him first The 8 reasons why he’d wait for your texts Is texting him first a good idea Finally, finding your answer and deciding what to do about it
1. He shows you he likes you even through texting, and/or IRL
He’s interested, he’s approaching, he’s caring towards you when you two text, or when you two meet up – He might just be waiting for your text, especially if he’s always the one texting first, he might take some time to see if you’d make a move too. On the other hand, if he shows signs that he’s not interested through text, or when you meet him, then he’s not waiting for your text. I’m sorry to be so harsh, but you need to move forward and not wait around for him to wait for you to text or make the first move.
2. He replies right away when you text him
If it’s been happening so often that it started becoming a pattern, then he most probably is waiting for you to text him – He has his reasons, which I’ll surely explain further in the article – But, it’s pretty logical when you think about it. He likes you, he’s sharing time with you, there’s a reason he’s not texting you, hence he’s waiting for your texts. It can seem a little strange, but this actually is pretty common, because as I mentioned in the beginning we have to read all these signs and sometimes we don’t read them correctly, and we do things to either clear them up or as a way of us reacting to what we got from those signs (even though misunderstood/misleading). So… yes, he replies right away, it has happened/has been happening a lot, he’s waiting for you to text him first.
3. “I suck at this, I’m sorry for being such a bad texter.”
Most men, or a lot of men, don’t speak much of the instinctive language in which we women slay at. That’s why most men don’t get the hints and get lost in those attempts to read between the lines, in fact sometimes they don’t even get the clues that they’re even supposed to read between the lines. Now we understand that their way of understanding is if things are put straight and clear in front of them, and they put the things out that way too (well, most of the time). So if he’s not the best texter in the world, and he lets you know about it, he tells you about it, then trust his word sister! Him being bad at texting could mean he doesn’t know what to text you, what topic to start, how to even start texting with you. Hence he’ll be waiting from your generous, smart & intelligent side to make the move and start conversations.
4. He shows signs he’s nervous around you
You can tell if he’s shy or nervous around you when you two decide to hang out, and he’s acting some kind of way. You can tell he’s a little nervous, and perhaps shy. This happens to most of us when we’re around someone we like, it’s just some of us are better at hiding it. In this case, he’s shy or nervous around you in real life, perhaps he gets nervous and shy when it comes to texting you. Perhaps he doesn’t know what to say, or how to start a conversation, so he just waits around for you to text him first. It reflects a bit on his personality. Him being afraid to make the first move, could be considered as some sort of fear of rejection, so if you feel like taking the lead, go girl!
5. He’s not often online, except for the times you text him
I’m not suggesting you check on him when he goes online and when he goes offline, what I’m saying is that if you happened to notice that he’s not using much of the media you use to communicate with, unless when you text him, then he could just be waiting for your text. It makes sense once you think about it: he’s receiving messages from other people, but is not very interested, hence he doesn’t use the app/media as much; but then he gets the text he’s been waiting for… Aaand, I’ll let you fill in the blank, because if this doesn’t ring any bell to you, I don’t know what will, sister!
6. He’s interested in you, but seems to have no clue about your side of the ‘story’
As I said before, men can’t read between the lines. When we tell them “I love sunrises”, or “I love sunsets” they won’t get the clue that we’d like to stay a little longer to see the sunset, or the sunrise with them, they just f*cking won’t! Their brain doesn’t work that way. We love giving hints, but they don’t get them all the time. In this case, he most probably has no clue that you like him, that you’re interested in him, that with a little investment he can get a taste of your cookie, he just didn’t get the hints! Him not knowing how you feel about him, can make him step back and wait for you to make a move so that he knows where you’re standing.
7. He often likes/comments your posts right away when you post them on your socials
He likes seeing what you’re up to, seeing your pictures, seeing you doing things or the things that you’re doing. This time he doesn’t hide it, because he likes and/or comments on your posts very soon after you post them. Let’s say you had a fight, whatever fight it might have been, and he was guilty of it, but has a big ego and can’t come up to you directly to talk about it. Now he takes the “hinter” title, you know, he’s now giving you the hints and waits for you to get them. If you didn’t get it yet, if he likes and/or comments on your stuff soon after posting it, there are a lot of chances that he’s waiting for a text from you. Even if you didn’t have a fight, it can be considered as a sign of interest towards you.
8. He’s not the type that makes the first move
You can know he’s not the type that makes the first move if you sit back and see or do a little bit of analysis on his behavior. I’m not saying to go all FBI on it, simply pay attention to his interaction with his friends, or whoever he’s around to. If he’s all super chill, people are constantly doing things for him, and he’s just sitting there getting what is served to him, then he could be the type that just doesn’t make the first move. He’s just used to that type of lifestyle. Or if, somehow, you found out he didn’t make the first move with other girls either then it’s just the way he does things, the way he’s built.
9. You know & feel that he’s intimidated by you – “She’s out of my league”
Whether he told you, or you realized it through his behavior, or his friends or someone close to him told you that he’s intimidated by you, this can mean he’s waiting for a move of yours. When he feels intimidated, chances are, he won’t even try because “he knows” he won’t get a response, or he won’t text you because he doesn’t want to interrupt/bother/annoy you, hence he sits and waits for your text to arrive.
Reasons why he’d wait for you to text him
I already discussed some of these above, but here they are once more, all nicely summed up: He’s scared or intimidated Fear that is built in him from past experiences, or intimidation can cause him to take space and wait for your move (as in, leave it up to you so you can lead it where you want it to). He’s confused about how you could be feeling about him This is one of the reasons why men stop texting for a while and then start again. He doesn’t know how you feel about him, he could fear he’ll irritate you if he texts you, so he keeps his distance and waits for your sign to let him know that you’re at least somewhat interested. He’s got other options When he’s got other options, he can spend effort and time elsewhere. In this case, he waits for you to text him and make the effort, and if you don’t he’d be fine with it, because he’s got other people to deal with. This does not make you worth any less or more, it’s just the way some men go for it. If you’re sure that this is the case for him, I’d suggest you leave and move on with your business. It’s just his way of doing things He’s passive, he’s used to other people to get sh*t done for him. He just is that way. He isn’t the one texting women or pursuing women. He’s that chill guy in the corner that’s fine if you approach him, but won’t really get out of the comfortable couch to come and talk to you. “It’s just sooo comfortable!!” He overthinks it, and just decides to drop it There’s the lazy type, and then there’s this guy. The type that overthinks it, will do his best to find topics that interest you, and to get your attention. The problem is, he’ll think of it so much, that at some point everything will seem stupid and pointless. So he’ll just give up, and wait for you to text him. He’s read/heard some advice to wait in order to make you wait, in order to get you interested Ah, yes! The “Make her chase you by doing this trick!” and the “She will fall for you instantly if you do this!”He’s giving it a try, he’s waiting, he’s hoping… He wants to see if you’re interested or not He stops texting and now waits for you to make the move. It is usually in the cases where he’s always the one texting first, and perhaps is getting the feeling that you’re not very into him, or that you’re not interested. Could be that the only logical thing at the moment is to wait and see how you react to his silence, to see if you care how his day went, or how he’s doing today.
Well, since he’s waiting… Should I text him first?
Now that you know he’s waiting, and you know his reasons, the best idea is to think them through and see if you get a reasonable answer from yourself. If your and his intentions are genuine, and there are no games being played in your relation, then there’s no reason not to text him. However, if the idea of texting him first is coming from a place of neediness for validation, attention, or anything else that’s not genuine, then texting him is not the best idea. At the end of the day we all have our reasons, for whatever action, and everything we say – at times sincere, at times not very much. If his and your words/actions are coming from a genuine, honest, kind place then let things flow naturally. Don’t try to force nor push things into a certain direction, and see where this takes you. Take care, Callisto
